In my last post I suggested that most of our problems are not complicated. If that is true why do we make things so complicated?
I believe it is because simplicity is hard. To face the world and our emotions as they truly are is exhausting and daunting.
If you pay attention you will notice, to avoid the pain of reality, you often choose to live in a partial fantasy land. Why do we choose to live in fantasy land?
What is so hard about facing our problems directly? Here are a few possible reason:
- The majority of the time our problem is created or made worse by actions we are choosing. Facing up to this means admitting we can’t have everything we want and it is our fault.
- The truth can be painful. For example: Most people know a person they care about a lot who doesn’t care about them in the same way. It is painful to admit that someone doesn’t think you are important.
- Often the solution to a problem involves making a sacrifice in some other area (comfort, pride, budget, commitments, etc).
- “Complex” situations often involve a desire to head in a different direction than the group you are involved with. We are genetically programmed to avoid isolation. Choosing something that moves us closer to isolation is biologically stressful.
After looking at that list it makes me want to find a chair and read a book and live in a fantasy land. So why shouldn’t we keep pretending that we have “complex” problems and avoid some of the pain?
Simply put: reality doesn’t give a damn about what you think. If you don’t believe in gravity you still hit the pavement hard when you jump out a window.
You can make the hard choices on your terms or wait for reality to smack you at a moment of her choosing.